1. What was your first exposure to Twitter?
When I was just a young child, my mother put me in a room with others who were infected so I would built up a natural immunity and not develop the much more serious adult onset form.
2. When did you really get into using the site?
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Eye injection gives a blind mouse the ability to see. Henry Waxman excited to start utilizing his new sense of sight.
You think Chick-fil-A is bad? Here’s a picture of another of Sarah Palin’s favorite restaurants.
CNN just reviewed “Magic Mike” as a family-friendly romp with oodles of card tricks and disappearing bunnies. WTF?!
Go back to slurping your large sodas America, we’ve got it covered.
Insurance mandate survives in 5-4 Supreme Court decision! Rush Limbaugh currently on phone screaming at his OxyContin dealer’s voicemail.
Tests only found weed in face-chewer’s system. Which seems oddly motivated for a pothead. Why not just order in and eat the delivery guy?
Obama’s new favorite catch phrase is: “It’s the right thing to do.” Related: Wilfred Brimley was just named his Secretary of Oatmeal.
Rep denies reports that Charlie Sheen trashed his hotel room. Claims he just redecorated it with semen and blow.
I’ve got a feeling Adam Carolla won’t be giving the eulogy at Nora Ephron’s funeral. Just a hunch.
1 in 3 Americans can’t afford to see the dentist. The British are coming! The British are coming!
Savannah Guthrie is set to replace Ann Curry on NBC’s “Today” show, leaving behind a promising career of folk singing and porn.
Bad day for John Edwards. Great day for Rielle MILF Hunters.
